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I am a very religious person and I take my religious life seriously, but there is one thing I do not expect from a fellow christian any day anytime: being told to pray (because I told them my problem). I know I have to pray and yes I pray. when I tell someone of my troubles, they do not have to tell me to pray, that is not what I am looking for.

When someone (friend or anyone) comes to you and tells you of their troubles and everything else that is ailing them, you listen. “…The first one is to try not to use someones depression as an opportunity to introduce them to your God.”– M. Mabhena. these words were said by a very good friend of mine. I say the same about someone who is troubled. Do not, I repeat, do not start telling them about Jesus now that they are broke and have to pay their debts, feed their children and break up a fight with their aunts and siblings. You could have done that yesterday or last week or last year. That is not what we want to hear.

Being told to pray is like telling someone that their problems are a result of not praying enough. Being broke, stressed and a bit out of order once in a while does not mean i am not in connection with God. These are the trials and temptations that are written in a few chapters and verses of the bible. They are bound to happen. Me telling another person of them means I want to let it out. It has been eating me and i just want it to stop. Ever heard of venting?

Just sit and listen, that is the most you can do. Now that you cannot tell me about Jesus, do net tell me your problems, they are not solving mine. It just shows you are not listening to them. Pitching your problems while they tell you theirs sends a message which says, “We all have problems, deal with it.“-selfish right? Or maybe you think they are asking for money?

At least say “Its going to be fine”, those are the most soothing words. “You got this.”, gives someone the confidence to face their problem head on. Give them he boost talk, not a motivational speech (they usually end with the “you need to pray” phrase we all know we cannot hear it for now.

We can all talk about God any other day and time. We know he loves us and we love him, Amen.

Chipo K

6 thoughts on “If you cannot listen to me, don’t tell me to pray”

  1. Thank you for this piece.
    If you think someone needs prayer, pray for them yourself.
    You can maybe tell tell that you will pray for them to gain strength to be okay again.
    Vele telling me to pray is an insult nje

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